my dearest little bean,

 you are now five months old. time is flying by and i hardly recognize that teeny blob of a baby in photos from months past.
this past month was the hardest one for me as a new mama. you were sick once. and then, as you were getting better, you started teething and then got two vaccination shots. these changes seemed to send you over the edge again and you got sick. again. and then i got sick. and there is not much rest for a mama taking care of a little one. with your teething you had a slight fever, poor appetite, excessive drool and were quite irritable and not sleeping so well. this, of course, was compounded by the cough and plugged/runny nose that kept waking you up during naps and nighttime.
your sleeping habits up until this point had been amazing. so all of these changes really rocked papa and i. i wasn’t prepared for this change and i spent a little time worrying i was doing something wrong to make you feel like this. now papa and i realize that you are still growing and going through so many changes that, like most things in this life, it is just a season. some seasons just happen to be easier than others. and you know what, ramona bean? we’re happy to go through all of these things, easy or hard, with you.
and thank goodness for the wonderful people in our life during times like this. amy, after receiving a pathetic text from me, came over and hugged you close and sent me to my room so i could take a much-needed nap. i was happy for the rest and it helped a ton! you and i got better shortly after that. you are so loved by so many people.
you still go to bed like a champ. last night you even fell asleep at root down and stayed asleep for the entire dinner. mama and papa got a rare chance to dine and commune w family without having to rush home to put you to bed. but you are waking up so so early now. 3:39 AM and you are wide awake and happy as can be. sheesh. i do not know how to be wide awake and happy at 3:39 in the morning. silly girl.
but even with all these crazy sleep changes you are still the most charismatic and engaging baby. your smile takes up your whole face and you give it freely to most anyone. generally, (unless you are in need of a nap or a boob) you are easy-going, charming, and filled with glee. you have a little giggle. it seems to come out in the evening or anytime you are naked. papa and i call it the little fat boy laugh: a low laugh that’s sort of a chuckle. it’s adorable, really.
you continue to grow long and, well, chunky. you are still in the 90th percentile for everything and we see that as a very good sign that you are healthy and thriving (as if we needed numbers to notice that). you have rubberband wrists and ankles: your healthy fat folds over into the most delicious rolls and your arms and legs look like sausages.
you’ve discovered your feet and toes (who knew you’d be able to reach them with all that chub!). you grab at the bows on your socks and hang on to your feet with both hands like a monkey, rocking around on your padded diaper butt. this gives mama a helluva time trying to change your diaper or clothes. it cracks me up really.
you exhibit a lot more independence  and comfort in being away from me for longer periods of time. previous months i had to wrap you up snugly to keep you happy when out and about. now you are fine to ride alongside max for long walks in the stroller. you even fall asleep in there sometimes! also, it doesn’t faze you to be passed around from friend to family member to regulars at the shop. you are content to be in most anyone’s arms. it’s really been a slow but natural progression to have you less and less attached to me at all times. and humbling too. i know i’m still your world but you’re discovering that there are many more people and things besides me and i–so soon, too soon!–am learning to be ok with your explorations and acquainting yourself w the bigger picture. after you’ve been “away” from me–be it a nap in the swing or being snuggled up with someone else–i love nothing more than to cuddle you in close and wrap you up. i always will. stop growing up so fast!
silent night, holy night
all is calm, all is bright
round yon virgin mother and child
holy infant so tender and mild
sleep in heavenly peace
sleep in heavenly peace
love, mama
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One Response to five months old

  1. zach clark says:

    whoa. too much naked baby.

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